Thursday, April 22, 2010

Grrrr

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Two questions:

1-Why do some guys think that relentlessly making fun of people is funny? I have several co-workers of the male persuasion who don't know when to stop and genuinely think that finding ways to laugh at anyone else's expense is hilarious and totally socially acceptable. No, my feelings are not hurt...their stupidity does not cause me emotional distress, I just find it extremely irritating.

2-Why is it that guys expect you to find their mockery of you humorous but when you turn the tables and burn them with some mad teasing skills of your own, they get offended? I'm just saying, don't dish it out if you can't take it (you big babies).


In conclusion...boys, a little teasing is good. But you can only take it so far before it's ceases to be funny and becomes annoying. So learn when to stop...if you don't know how much is too much, find a nice, honest female friend to ask. Because seriously, you're not as funny as you think you are.

Tragedy...

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I was on facebook last night and noticed a few of my friends had posted a request for everyone to pray for the husband of their friend who went missing while hiking in Hawaii last week. This friend of theirs is a girl I went to junior high and high school with...I wouldn't say she and I were friends, but she was in some of my classes, we did a play together, etc...so I definitely can say I know who she is.

Well...I checked the local news websites tonight to see if there was any kind of follow up, and it appears they have found his body. It hasn't "officially" been identified as him, but the description of his clothing matches...so...yeah.

Sick doesn't even begin to cover how I feel for her and their son...I cannot fathom what it would be like to lose your husband or father. I pray they will be able to find peace soon.

Crazy how events like this force you to really appreciate what you have.

Friday, April 16, 2010

STUPID people

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I went to Wal-Mart yesterday. I parked the car, started walking towards the store and noticed a man and a little boy walking in front of me...the kid couldn't have been older than 2 or 3. The man seemed to be in a hurry, and was repeatedly scolding the child for not keeping up with him, to which said child responded, "Daddy my legs are tired!" So the man irritatedly picked him up. My blood started to heat up a bit...but whatever, right? We both grabbed a cart, and the man proceeded to try to put the boy into the child's seat and when his legs didn't go in the right way the first time, he said, "Look at what you're doing, you little shithead!"

My blood went from slightly warm to intensely boiling.

Those of you who know me are aware that I am not super awesome at hiding how I feel about things. So naturally I shot him the most malevolent stinkeye I could muster and as I walked past I muttered, "Nice going Dad...real nice." He gave me a look that said, "You don't know what it's like, you don't have a kid to inconvenience you at the grocery store."

Ok...he probably wasn't thinking that. He was probably thinking of some more colorful language. But that's what it seemed like to me.

Moving on...as I maneuvered my cart through the toilet paper aisle (which was actually the sole reason I was there, but since I bothered to go I figured I should probably pick up the rest of the stuff on the grocery list, despite the fact that it was in no way as urgent as the toilet paper), I'm pretty sure people were wondering who peed in my Cheerios because again...*points to self*...not good at hiding emotions.

Seriously though, it's stuff like that which makes this infertility business especially hard for me. I'm able to deal with being the only one of my married friends without kids, I'm able to deal with people asking me why I don't have kids and thinking that it's because I'm selfish or a bad person (see previous "Cheesy Moment" post), I'm able to deal with my friends working on babies #2 and #3 while I'm still desperately working on baby #1 (and I'm even genuinely happy for them!)...but this kind of thing, no....no. I try not to judge...I know that if I am ever lucky enough to have children of my own I will not be a perfect parent, and I know that sometimes your kids can work your last nerve until the patience which was previously hanging by a thread is totally gone...but I would never say something like that to a child. I don't think most parents do. But I see that, and it's like..."Dear Universe, what the hell??? That douchebag is a father and I got nothing???? You suck...and I kinda hate you."

But...of course, life isn't fair. I've been hearing that since I was little (thanks Mom and Dad...oh, and thanks for not swearing at me and calling me derogatory names). I just hope that...WHEN I'm a mom (go, positive thinking!), I will ALWAYS remember how precious of a gift it is to have kids (which will in turn lead to me not being a jerk to them, even if I am in a hurry at the grocery store)...

...I'm pretty sure I will.


Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Of All the Random Things...

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A few days ago Jacob and I went to the infertility clinic to do another round of IUI. It's always a slightly awkward moment when they call us back to "collect" from Jacob, but the past couple times we've been there he's been joking with the lab tech about the contents of "the folder" and all that good stuff...it helps ease the awkwardness.

ANYWAY, in the room where they send us to get the sample, there's this...I guess the only way to describe it is a beanie-baby type thing in the shape of a sperm. Yes...you read that correctly, they make sperm toys. Or something. So...the last time we were there Jacob asked the lab tech where in the world they got that, and he said it was from an infertility convention. Then he showed us some of the other things the doctors have come back with...magnets, pens, stickers...and most random of all, a shot of vanilla liquor in a sperm-shaped shot glass. That's right...sperm alcohol. So naturally as soon as Jacob saw that he asked if he could have it because really, who doesn't want to own something like that (you know you all want one)? The lab tech said no because that's the only one they had.

So this time when we were called back, Jacob inquired again as to whether he might be able to take it home to have and cherish. The lab tech just laughed and said no...and that was that.
Now, the process for IUI is kind of a long one...they get the sperm and then we have to wait for 2 hours while they wash it and separate the strong swimmers from the weak ones. Yeah, it's good times. Anyway, after the 2 hrs had passed and they called us back again, the nurse said that the lab tech told her to give something to us, and then she handed Jacob his very own sperm-shaped shot. I have no idea whether they found another one or if he decided they could part with the one they had. But needless to say, Jacob was elated. And I am including some pictures for your viewing pleasure (please forgive the fuzziness, I'm not super-skilled at taking close-up pics):




I know you can't really see it b/c the picture is fuzzy, but on the tag there's a little sperm saying "Ich komme!" Which, if my limited knowledge of German holds true, means "I come!" Priceless.

So yeah, if you ever need to do any type of infertility treatment you should try asking the clinic what kind of awesome swag they have...haha...you could end up with something awesome.

Friday, April 2, 2010

Doctor Douchemonkey

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Dear Doctor who doesn't want to treat anyone who voted for Obama,

While I think you are within your rights to post your little sign instructing all those who voted for our current president to seek health care someplace other than your office...


...I think your hissy fit/temper tantrum (I'm pretty sure that since you went to college and then medical school, it's safe to say you're at least 8 years old) is pathetic, and I've concluded that you're a douchemonkey. We democrats will take our bladder infections elsewhere as I'm sure there are many urologists who will be happy to treat us despite our political affiliation.

In closing, I'd like to kindly ask you to please try to remember what being a doctor means...because last time I checked, doctors were supposed to diagnose and treat people, not punish them for believing differently.

Yeah...there's no love here,
Julie