My Cat is Terrified of the Furnace

Every time the furnace kicks on at our apartment, poor Michael Jackson becomes petrified with fear, and he just freezes and meows in despair. You can't really see him because it's too dark, but Jacob and I think this is pretty funny. Observe:

2008 with the Hodgens

The End of a Christmas Tradition

Ok so I was going to write a slightly more detailed blog about this, but I need to get my cold little butt to work soon so this will be the super condensed Reader's Digest version.

Once upon a time there was a crazy family whose former English major father decided it would be super cool to have a Christmas Spelling Bee. 10 rounds, 10 words per kid, the words started easy and got harder as we progressed. Then at the end we had the bonus word which was SUPER hard and which you had to wager your points like on Jeopardy (I won quite a few times by simply wagering nothing b/c I knew I'd misspell it). Everyone wins a prize, but obviously the champion's prize was always the best. Actually, it was always a game of some sort. ANYWAY, the spelling bee became an annual tradition which lasted for over a decade, and then the former English major father decided to switch from the knowledge of how words are spelled to the knowledge of random trivia...and a much more Jeopardy-like game emerged, which only lasted for 3 years before Dad decided he was burned out and please stick a fork in that tradition 'cuz it's done. So this year was the last one of those. What we will do next year, I do not know--perhaps my sister and I will come up with something ingenius. Or perhaps we will do nothing. Anyway, here are some photos I took to document the experience:

The white board with the categories of trivia ("Nuts" was about the nuts you eat, you perverts...) and where Dad keeps score...

Dad reading a question to somebody--that's Kaj in the chair, but I don't think it was her turn b/c she would be more concentrated. Those are her hubby's legs on the bottom left...

And lastly, my bearded hubby showing my niece and nephew what we won (and apparently giving them a lecutre or some sort of life's lesson as well...). Jacob got a glow-in-the-dark puzzle for coming in 3rd and I got the Game Trio set (yes, that is Jenga that you see, come over any time and we'll play). And, as you can probably guess, since my prize is a game (well, 3 games actually), I won. Yup, with a score of 400 points exactly, I crushed the competition to become the final Christmas Challenge Champion. Actually, I just got really lucky and got a super easy question on the bonus round--plus I wagered a lot of points this time. :-) Anyway, goodbye Christmas Challenge...we will miss your randomness. But hopefully we will find something just as random as a replacement tradition...stay posted.

An Evening with Neil...

So remember yesterday when it started to snow really hard and the roads got all slippery and it was basically a huge mess? Remember how most of you were probably staying at home, saying "I will take care of ______ (fill in blank w/applicable task requiring driving) later" to yourselves because you're smart like that? Yes, well...I am not that smart. In fact, I waited just long enough for the roads to get really crappy before I climbed in my car and headed out into the muck...why did I do this, you ask? My willingness came from the knowledge that I had a ticket to see the guy whose music I was listening to practically before I was even born:

Yes, that's right...Neil Diamond. Um, he's a bit older now. A lot older, actually. Anyhoo, we all ("we" being myself, my little sister Kaj, and her friends Tom and Emily) met up at my parents' house so we could carpool to the marvelous event that was the Neil Diamond concert. We had a rought start...when Tom's car got stuck in the snow after backing out of the driveway, us girls got out to push and he tried to kill us by "forgetting" to take the car out of reverse...but once we'd all screamed (simultaneously) and he put it into drive, we managed to free the car of its icy prison, jumped back in while it was still moving (we felt so cool), and hit the road. After picking Kaj's hubby Mike up from work, we headed for the Trax station in Sandy where we were supposed to meet Tom's date Kelly. Our awesome plan was to ride Trax up to downtown and then eat dinner before the show. But when we got to the station, Kelly was nowhere to be found. After missing the first train, Tom called her and learned that she was at the next stop up (who knew there was more than 1 stop in Sandy? Um, obviously not us) so we caught the next train and told her where we were so she could hop on. We pulled up to her stop but the dang doors wouldn't open, so then we had to get off at the next stop after that and wait for another train to come so she could get on that one and blah blah blah. We thought this was a good idea, but for some reason there was a huge delay in between trains and we had to wait outside FOREVER. Our toes were numb, we were starving and we were getting really gumpy. FINALLY we were able to all meet up and away we went to the Energy Solutions Arena. By the time we actually got inside we only had 10 minutes to spare (no time for dinner obviously), but we managed to grab nachos and soda (I don't think I've ever inhaled food so quickly in my entire life) and settled in our seats...which were pretty much behind the stage. We didn't care though, because even though we would be staring at the back of Neil, we were still close enough to see the back of him really well. :-)

The concert started, Neil stepped out onto the stage in his sparkly black shirt and all was right with the world. I was so sad that cameras weren't allowed because that left me with only my cell phone to document the experience. Anyway, here's Neil singing "Love on the Rocks" to us.

If we got tired of looking at the back of him, there was this lovely screen to our left so we could actually see his face...I can't remember what he's singing in this one but it could be "Holly Holy."

At one point Neil (compassionate soul that he is) turned around to those of us sitting behind him and said, "What did they tell you to get you to buy those seats? That they were close to the stage? Those are some really bad seats..." (Kaj I thought they were awesome seats) and then he came and sang to us.

All in all, it was one of the best concerts I've ever been to. My favorite part was when he sang "Forever in Blue Jeans" and "Sweet Caroline" (we even got him to sing an extra chorus of that one) and then of course, his encore when he changed from his sparkly black shirt to a sparkly red one and sang "America" for us. Awwwweeeesssooommmmmme. Yeah, I think there's a very good chance I could die now, and not even be that upset about it. Say what you will about the cheesiness of Neil Diamond, but if I could still put on one hell of a show at his age (the place was packed!), I would think I was pretty amazing too.

Why Dogs Are Pathetic and Cats Are Awesome

At 8:00 this morning I was rudely awakened by the sound of my next door neighbor's dog barking. The walls here are very thin, and the sound from other apartments also travels quite well through the vents (we hear our neighbors downstairs fighting quite frequently...awkward). He is a very small dog, not sure of the breed (I want to say chihuahua), and he frequently has a tendency to get extremely distressed (I'm sure when he's left home alone). Annoyed, I rolled over and stuffed my blankets over my ears. That helped a bit, but not enough for me to fall back to sleep.

Friends, it is now 10:30 and he has still not stopped barking, howling, and whining. I keep waiting for him to bark himself hoarse but apparently dogs don't do that. I just hope that my poor husband who worked all night long and is now trying to sleep can't hear it (I pulled a fan out of the closet for white noise in the bedroom--hopefully it's enough).

So incessant barking (for whatever reason) is definitely reason #1 on my "Why dogs are pathetic and cats are awesome" list (neither of my cats has EVER meowed for 2 and a half hours...10-15 minutes maybe, but they always get the hint and realize that whining isn't going to get them what they want so they shut up), but I'd like to share a few more reasons with you:
2-Every dog I've met has the same basic personality: "love me love me love me I'll do anything for you to love me pleeeeeeaaaase pet me I need attention I can't entertain myself!" Each cat I've met has a separate and very distinct personality.
3-When driving along and encountering a dog in the road, 9 times out of 10 they will sit there and stare at you instead of removing themself from harm's way aka your car.
4-How many cats have you seen chase their own tails? Enough said.
5-You can leave a cat home alone all day and it won't whine, destroy your house, or otherwise despair over your absence. But when you come home you still get the same "I'm happy to see you" greeting.
6-Several of my neighbors get up at all hours of the night (and wee hours of the morning) to take their dogs outside to pee or poop on the sidewalk (there's grass everywhere! Come on!). Not me. My cats use this lovely thing called a litter box so I get to stay in my nice, cozy bed.
7-Dogs are stinky and you have to hose them down or try to get them to stay in the bathtub while you give them a bath. Cats clean themselves...and if for some reason I do give them a bath, I can do it in the sink and they sit still for me even if they don't like it.

I could continue, but out of respect for my dog-loving friends, I will leave it there (you may disagree with my overall conclusion but I'm sure you can see that I've made a few very good points...). So here's the skinny of it: dogs are dumb. Cats are smart. Hasn't this been scientifically proven or something (wink wink)?

Sigh. 10:55. Still going strong. It's like the energizer bunny of annoying sounds. I will stick with my cats, thank you very much.

I was insane back then too...

So today while hanging out at my parents' house using their washer and dryer because I feel it's my duty as their child to mooch off of them, I was digging through a box of my old stuff they have so willingly been storing in their basement (again, Julie=mooch). I was actually looking for some sheet music...but then I stumbled across a little blue notebook. I stared at it blankly, remembering writing in it but not remembering what I'd written or why. So I abandoned my sheet music quest and cozied up on the couch for what I hoped would be a good read. The first entry goes a little something like this:

After reading Peter's "notebook of thought," I told him it's healthy to write down one's thoughts and ideas like he's been doing. He suggested that I try it for myself. Why not, right? Hopefully this will be a good means of unscrambling all that goes through my head and help me make sense of it. We'll see how this turns out.

Sweeeeeet, I blogged (well, minus the computer) before I even knew what blogging is! Go me. Most of the entries are the rantings of a selfish 19-year old trying to figure out her place in the world and wondering why life is so hard while dealing with things way over her head. But it's interesting to remember those emotions and experiences, although many of the things I wrote about I can't recall--in an effort to make it strictly about thoughts and not a journal entry, I never wrote any dates and rarely used names--but I do know I started it during my first semester of college, which was fall of 2000. I've decided to post some entries here so you all can have a glimpse into my brain, uncensored.

I like rain. I like the thunder, and lightning really is one of nature's best fireworks. I like the feel of rain, the look of rain, and the smell of rain before, during and after the storm. It's pleasant and cleansing. I'm amazed at how captivated I am by it. I can stand most anyplace and watch the rain for hours. How swiftly it passes though...usually only lasting for minutes at a time, which makes watching it for hours slightly difficult, if you know what I mean.

Conflict is a funny thing. The way something that may seem minimal can absorb an individual's life and become their focus whether they want it to or not...seems stupid to everyone except those involved. Then there are one-sided conflicts; those are the worst. When one person views something as a problem and another sees it as nothing. Is the upset party being over-emotional or is the ignorant party being insensitive? I think it's situational, but to compromise I'm going to say it's both. I think it all comes down to communication. As I told someone today, "Communication is a vital key to any kind of relationship. Without it, you're screwed." I like it...makes my point AND serves as comic relief.

The hall of flags: nice spot to study during your break, or primo meat market for the lustful, lonely and desperate to pass their time by "checking out chicks?" It disgusts me.

Passion is freakin' powerful. It's why poets write sonnets. I'm not going to write a sonnet. Being emotionally involved is taking such an extreme risk on yourself. It can feel so great but it hurts more than anything when you lose. And I'm not talking only about relationships. The concept applies to everything in one way or another, so why get involved for the temporary high only to be crushed by the big let down at the end?

I wish I always had the energy and love for life that possessed me tonight. I haven't been like that in so long. So I'm in a good mood but I'm almost crying (blast we females and our stupid emotions). I need french fries.

"I won't weigh you down with good intention." -Sarah McLachlan
I am not bitter I am not bitter I am not bitter. Although the more I look at it, the more I realize I have every right to be. However, bitterness only causes decay, and I really can't afford that.

Feelings are so very complicated; they ruin everything. And yet, without them life just wouldn't be life and everyone knows that. I just hate not being able to interpret them, especially when they're my own. I suppose the most difficult feelings to interpret would be one's own, but still...it's frustrating. I don't know what or even how I feel. I hate that. It leaves me directionless, and we all know how much I dislike wandering. To feeling nothing would truly make life so much more simple. I've resolved that at this particular time, I'm going to feel as little as I can of select emotions. Some would argue that I'm depriving myself of valuable experiences, but I don't see it that way. As far as I know, I have plenty of time to "feel." This should be interesting.

Only when you remove yourself from the problem can it be observed objectively and then resolved. Or at least that's how it works some of the time. There's not a set standard. Exceptions bite...they're like lipids: no matter what you do, they're always there. Ok, that was really lame. So much for my attempt at clever similes.

So there you have it....excerpts from my first blog. Hooray for trips down memory lane. :-)

Prop 8: The Musical

WARNING: if you were for Prop 8, here's your heads up--you might be very offended by this.

Seriously though, for those of us who were against Prop 8, HERE is one of the coolest things I have ever seen. And I love it with my entire soul.

Brain Dump

So I have a lot of little snippets to comment on today. Hooray for brain dumping!

-I have learned that I am not unlike a small child when it comes to having to sit still & be quiet. Haha I'm really not so good at it. Every weekend (starting Thursday night/Friday morning) poor Jacob works from 1:30am to sometime between 9 & 11:00am. This means, of course, that he sleeps late into the afternoon--depending on what time he gets off, usually until at least 5:00. Since I have the weekends off, this means I am home all day. I try SO HARD to be quiet, but I've found that oftentimes when I'm attempting to be quiet I end up being louder than I otherwise would have been. My poor husband.

-Twilight is better the 2nd time you see it, I've decided. Especially if you brace yourself for the stupid cameo and just ignore it. Totally makes it better.

-Did you know if you stop working out for a month and then start up again, this time throwing in some yoga and pilates, you're probably going to be really sore for like, an entire week?

-I went into sentimental mode and rented Return to Oz from Netflicks, as my siblings and I used to watch it frequently when we were younger (although not as much as we watched The Chipmunk Adventure or Bedknobs and Broomsticks...). Dude, I had forgotten how wacked out that movie is! It's like The Wizard of Oz became a crazy drug addict and spawned an insane sequel. So awesome! We also noticed that the girl who plays Dorothy is the same actress who plays Adam Sandler's girlfriend in The Waterboy.

-Robot Chicken: Starwars II is hilarious. I'd put the link to it (on YouTube) so you all can see for yourself, but the guy who posted it said he's taking it down tomorrow because they got on his case for copyright infringement or something. Too bad. I love Robot Chicken. Seriously, Seth Green is a genius.

-Sometimes Facebook is a blessing and a curse. I mean, I love it for the simple fact that I am a huge gossip (yadda yadda, I know it's naughty but I do it all the same) and I love being able to see what people are up to without having to actually talk to them. And I know people have added me to their friend list for the same reasons. For the record, I do pride myself on only adding people who I'm actually friends with, but if someone requests to add me I usually let them even if I feel it's a stretch. ANYWAY, so today I was perusing about and noticed that one of my "friends" had posted some pics. Now, I always thought this girl hated me--she dated my high school boyfriend's best friend and was never very friendly to me at all--so imagine my surprise when she added me. So anyhoo, I'm browsing through her pics when I see a familiar face. "Hmmm" I think as I click to see the next one. Then my heart takes a momentary pause followed by thunderous pounding as recognition kicks in. There, in her pictures, is my ex boyfriend. NOT the one from high school. No, this is the one I dated a few months before meeting Jacob...the one I now "lovingly" refer to as Psycho (cuz boy, was he ever!). TOTAL deja vu, completely took me back--there he is, his stupid face grinning next to hers and oh, his best friend is there too. Looking through the pics was so very strange because I'm sure that had we taken photos when all of us were hanging out, they would have looked very similar. CREEPY, huh?!?!?! I'm thinking I'll go ahead and remove her from my friend list...thus avoiding accidentally stumbling across his ugly mug ever again. :-)

-Last but certainly not least, I have successfully beat Guitar Hero on medium mode. Not so sure I'll be able to beat it on hard mode...when they throw in that 5th button I'm a total mess.

Ok well, I'm sure there's more, but we gotta take off for Sunday dinner at the parents' house. Until next time...

Happy Happy Turkey Day

Ah, Thanksgiving...the day of over-indulegent eating just because some Puritans landed near Plymouth Rock and shared a meal with the Natives. Good times.

I've always been a fan of Thanksgiving, myself. In my family, we'd have the traditional turkey meal...then my Dad would spend the rest of the afternoon watching football while he carved the turkey we didn't eat and us kids would put up our Christmas decorations. Thanksgiving (despite what Wal-Mart and the mall had to say about it...) was always the starting point for "magical" Christmas season.

This year, however, feels different. I promised myself it wouldn't, because I would decide to be happy...but despite my best efforts to have a positive attitude, I still woke up at 5:30 with pain in my heart and an empty feeling in my chest. Yeah. 1 year ago today was the day I discovered that I had lost our baby. And it's silly, because why should today feel any different from any other day of the year? I don't think it should. And yet, for some incredibly stupid reason, I feel like I just found out again; I am reminded with perfect clarity how it felt to lose that child. It really hurts.

So you know me and my theraputic writing...I thought I'd just get it out there, perhaps to talk about it a little will aleviate the pain a bit. Cuz this really, really sucks. I think part of the problem is that when it happened, I consoled myself by saying that I'd definitely be pregnant again in a year's time, so even though this year would be awful, next year would be better. And now here I am, a year later and still nothing.

I will say this: despite the anguish of that experience, I am grateful for the knowledge that it is at least physically possible for me to get pregnant...because right now, that's all I have to go on.

Anyway, thanks as always for listening. I do sincerely hope that everyone has a great Thanksgiving. I am thankful for all you guys' friendship and love...and your willingness to listen. :-)

Now, as a completely random ending to this post and getting back to that whole positive attitude/I'm choosing to be happy thing, I'd like to quote one of my favorite movies (Addam's Family Values--from Gary's Thanksgiving Play the kids put on at summer camp)...as the kinds are dancing around dressed as turkeys, they sing...

"Eat us! Hey, it's Thanksgiving Day
Eat us! We make a nice buffet
We lost the race with farmer Ed
Eat us 'cuz we're good and dead
White man or red man
From East, North or South
Chop off our legs
..and put 'em in your mouth

Eat me! Sauteed or barbequed
Eat me! We once were pets but now we're food
We won't stay fresh for very long
So eat us before we finish this song
Eat us before we finish this song!"

Hehehe Kajsia, that was for you baby.

My Weekend (but mostly a Twilight review)

Hello friends,
In order to not feel completely pathetic, I am refusing to dedicate this post entirely to Twilight, which I just finished watching (without even having to wait in line or arrive 5 hours early--I got to the theater 15 minutes early and still got a PRIMO seat--hooray for seeing movies on Sunday morning at the new Cinemark by University Mall, nobody seems to know that it's open yet).

So, first things first...here is my latest obsession:

This HORRIBLE picture of yours truly (aw, come on, I've been sick!) is evidence of how I wasted a good chunk of my weekend--yes that is a Guitar Hero guitar in my hands. Jacob thought it would be hilarious to document it. I was not happy. Anyway, we just traded our PS3 for a Wii and Guitar Hero came with it. Having never played before, I was quite hesitant and the first song I played was a total disaster. But then I guess my decade of piano lessons kicked in and I found that I am not too shabby. I beat the entire game (Guitar Hero III) in 2 days. Granted, it was on easy mode...I'm finding medium mode to be a lot more challenging...but that's no good for my obsession because now I'm even more determined to beat it again. So if you need me, you'll probably be able to find me on my couch rocking out to The Rolling Stones or Poison or something.

Secondly, for all you Bond fans, Quantum of Solace is pretty decent, and I'm not a Bond fan at all. Just make sure you watch Casino Royale first; if my brother- and sister-in-law hadn't given me the rundown of that one on the way to the theater, I would have been pretty lost. Even so, the action sequences are very well thought out and executed, and Daniel Craig has some of the most beautiful eyes I've ever seen...so even if I had been confused with the plot, I still would have been entertained. I give it a 6.5 out of 10.

Lastly...Twilight. Unofficial spoiler alert: I'll try not to give anything away for those of you who haven't seen it, but if you haven't you might want to stop reading here. We begin with the bad...
#1: I tried not to be too nitpicky, and I know that Twilight in itself is one hell of a cheesy story, but there were moments when the cheese envelope was pushed too far, even for hopeless romantics like me (like when they just lay in the grass and oogle at each other....waaaaay too drawn out, show us something else please).
#2: The whole falling in love part was rushed--I mean seriously, "I'm the bad guy stay away from me" today, "The lion falls in love with the lamb" tomorrow (ok, that's not what happened exactly, but that's how it felt)...where's the transition? They needed the scene where Bella faints in Biology and Edward takes her to the nurse because it transitions their relationship and basically the entire story. I was mostly ok with the other parts that deviated from the book, but I really thought that was too pivotal a scene to be left out.
#3: Lastly, and this is a big one, Stephanie Meyer's cameo was the LAMEST thing I have seen in cinema for a very long time...she basically ruined the credibility of the film by showing up in the very world she created. If you want to have a cameo, fine...you wrote it, you deserve to be in the movie. But could you at least pull an M. Night Shyamalan and show up as some minor character and NOT yourself? Or couldn't they have had the waitress say, "Here you go, ma'am" instead of "Here you go, Stephanie"? And couldn't she be reading the newspaper instead of typing on her laptap?? I'm just saying, when you show up in the world you created, you destroy the believability of that world even existing. And while we all know Twilight's world isn't real, the success of the books is due to the fact that deep down inside, all we women want it to be.

Ok, ok...enough ranting and raving before I really offend my fellow Twilight fans...here's the good stuff...
#1-The vampires were able to be vampires without looking too ridiculous. I was worried about the growling, hissing, biting and so forth...but the actors managed to accomplish all of the above without overdoing it (even the sparkly Edward part wasn't over the top).
#2-Kudos on the fight scenes, which were spectacular but not too lengthy.
#3-I thought the casting was really good (despite my initial reservations on Kristen Stewart as Bella, I did enjoy the chemistry between Bella and Edward). I quite dislike Jacob Black in the books, but try as I might I could not dislike him in the movie (perhaps because the actor they got is really good-looking...??), so I think that will effectively contribute to the conflict in the sequels (you know they'll make all 4, even though right now they only have New Moon in the works...), at least for me.
#4-Who didn't love watching the Cullens play baseball? Well done, well done.
#5-Despite what I mentioned above, I think they did a really good job of keeping the integrity of the original story intact, cheese and all.
So I'm going to go ahead and give it an 8 out of 10. Take out that cameo and it gets a 9 haha.

Ok, if I write any more about this I will cross the "I'm almost pathetic" line into "Twilight is my entire life" territory, so I'm going to sign off and enjoy the rest of my weekend...probably by playing Guitar Hero or something.

Wedding Receptions

Things I Hate About Wedding Receptions:

• Having to talk to people I don't know and whom I'll never see again
• Wearing a dress and heels for way longer than I'd care to
• The incredibly cheesy music playing in the background
• People asking me if I have kids, and when I say no, them informing me that I should have them soon because I'm "really missing out"
• Seeing my brother-in-law come without my sister because she refuses to be around the family, and feeling responsible even though logically I know it's not my fault
• Cleaning up after it's over

Things I Love About Wedding Receptions:

• Seeing important people from my life whom I haven't seen in forever, like the sweet old lady who taught me how to play the piano
• Showing off my husband to...everyone
• My ex-boyfriend's father coming up to me just to see how I've been and to tell me that I am still his favorite out of all his son's girlfriends
• Seeing that the people who used to think they were better than everybody else have gained just as much weight (or more) as the rest of us
• Chocolate-dipped pretzels
• Reminiscing about my own wedding
• Seeing my brother-in-law, even without my sister...because it's been 5 years
• Hanging out with my photographer friend when she's not busy snapping pictures
• Watching a 22-year old guy befriend my grandma by talking to her about Peter, Paul & Mary
• Seeing my sister and her new hubby look so happy

All in all, I think it was a good night. :-)

Kajsia's Wedding

My little sister got married today. It was good times.

SO not what I had in mind...

First, the good news: I still have a job. Not that most of you knew I was potentially not going to have a job...but I do, so go me.

See, they recently (as in, last week) reorganized the entire call center where I work by combining the 2 largest departments: customer service and data entry (I work in data entry). While I had originally taken comfort in the fact that I was hired on as a permanent employee, I've been an unwilling participant in the stupidity of corporate America long enough to know that none of that shit matters in a merge situation. And a merge always means lay-offs. The "letting go" began with the assistant manager of my department (although between you and me, I'm quite positive that wasn't really due to the reorganization; she was, um, not the best employee), followed by another 13 or so people from customer service and a couple more from data entry. FORTUNATELY, I was one of the very few to survive...and as a bonus, I made it through without having to take a pay cut, and I even think I'm going to stay a supervisor.

But now the bad news: we have to take customer service calls as well as data entry calls. NOT that I am opposed to having more work to do. Truth be told, sometimes I felt kind of guilty for getting paid to do such an easy job. So more work is definitely not the problem...it's the type of work we're now doing. In data entry, our calls were primarily sales reps and technicians, which is good mainly because there's really no reason that you'd ever get yelled at. Sometimes they're rude, but for the most part it's pleasant work. Customer service calls are a different story. When I worked in a call center for Sears, I was yelled at on almost a daily basis, and I really did not like it (I only lasted about 3 months before I quit--my last day there still ranks pretty high on my list of best days ever). In fact, I vowed never to work that type of job ever again. And now, here I am. Tonight a customer yelled at me for 20 minutes...no exaggeration, the call was 23 minutes long and she was irate from the moment I answered the call...and of course, my hands were tied by the fact that she signed a contract so there was nothing I could do for her, which only raised her ire. Sigh. To be fair, most of the people I talk to are very nice...but it only takes one call like that to ruin your day (or in my case, night).

Am I gonna quit this job? Nope, I really don't think so. The management experience is valuable to my resume, I like my co-workers (mostly), we REALLY need the health insurance, and I've been watching the Utah Dept. of Workforce Svcs job board and I know I won't be able to make this much money without going to Salt Lake because Utah County is horribly cheap (and I have already done the commuting thing--I don't care to repeat it). So now I gotta find a coping mechanism because while I am a professional and will get the job done, this is not what I thought I'd be doing when I took the job.

Suggestions, anyone?

I've Been Tagged...

8 Things About Yours Truly...


8 TV shows that I watch (in no particular order):
1. Scrubs
2. Arrested Development (on DVD, of course. Sigh.)
3. Gilmore Girls (reruns)
4. Whatever is on CNN
5. The Daily Show
6. The Colbert Report
7. Scream Queens, Charm School, or whatever other brainless Vh1 reality show I get hooked on, as much as I had to admit it...
8. Yesterday I discovered Top Chef on Bravo while watching TV at my parents' house--sigh, if only I had satellite...

8 Favorite Restaurants:
1. Happy Sumo
2. Chili's
3. Bajio
4. Porter's Place (gotta love those scones!)
5. Cracker Barrel
6. Village Inn
7. Tony Roma's (not that they have any in this state--but they have one in Anaheim)
8. Sizzler

8 Things That Happened Yesterday:
1. Did laundry
2. Wrote an e-mail to my Grandma
3. Bought a snickerdoodle hot chocolate from juice n' java--YUM!
4. Went to work
5. Worked
6. Worked
7. Worked
8. Worked

8 Things That I am Looking Forward To:
1. Friday, for so many reasons
2. My sister's wedding next week
3. The Neil Diamond concert in December (YEAH!)
4. The holidays being over
5. Jacob getting his private pilot's license
6. Jacob getting his commercial pilot's license
7. Moving out of this apartment
8. Someday in the very distant future when I will not need to work any more...

8 Things on My Wish List
1. To be a Mom
2. To grow old with my husband
3. Being able to travel the world (which will be a lot more possible after Jacob becomes a pilot)
4. Just enough money to be financially stable, I don't need to be rich
5. A mediterranean cruise
6. The trip to Disneyworld Jacob has been promising me
7. Being able to buy a house
8. Ah hell, I'll say it: equal rights for everyone

8 Things I Love:
1. Jacob
2. My kitties
3. My family
4. My friends
5. Vacations, especially to Disneyland or Las Vegas
6. Good movies
7. Eating out
8. Music, especially The Veronicas

8 Things I don't like:
1. Infertility
2. Hypocrites
3. Closed-Minded People
4. Vegetables
5. Going to the dentist
6. Dieting
7. Exercising (haha maybe I should just put "being healthy in general")
8. Ignorance

8 People to Tag:
1. Kajsia
2. Maureen
3. Peter
4. Amy
5. I don't think anyone else reads my blog...
6.
7.
8.

The Air Show...Part 2 (The Thunderbirds)

After we saw a bunch of demonstrations of various fighter jets and what not, the day ended with a performance by The Thunderbirds, which is the Air Force's elite Air Demonstration Squadron. They fly six F-16 jets and perform around 80 times a year. It was quite impressive.

Here's a video of four of them in their delta formation:

In this one, four are flying in the delta formation and one of the solo planes flies through the middle of their formation. I did a really bad job of filming it, but you can still get the general idea.

So if you're ever in the Las Vegas area at the beginning of November, I'd highly recommend dropping by the air show. It's free and it's really good times. But be sure to bring camping chairs or something, otherwise you'll have to stand all day and that part kinda sucks. Yes.

The Air Show...Part 1

So, on our way back from Disneyland we stopped by the USAF Air Show at Nellis Air Force Base. That was, to my surprise, actually pretty cool. I ended up taking a lot of video of the demonstrations, so I wanted to post a few of them here (forgive my shakiness--it's hard to get good shots of stuff going really fast over my head)...this first one is of a jet car racing a MiG-17 fighter jet:

This next one is of an acrobatic pilot named Sean Tucker...he was amazing:

Vacations Are Fun...

Disneyland is awesome. That's about all I have to say about it.

What Jacob Has Been Up To...

So, Jacob probably won't like me dedicating a whole blog entry just to him, but oh well he'll live. ANYHOO, we received his medical certificate in the mail the other day so now he is fully authorized to complete his private pilot's training. So here's where he's been spending a lot of time lately...

Enjoying views such as this...

And when he's not in the cockpit, he's managed to secure employment here...

Yes, that's right--my husband now has any guy's dream job...running around scaring the crap out of adolescent kids. Would you want THIS guy jumping out at you in the dark?

I didn't think so. Ah, I'm so proud...YEAH BABY!

A Facebook Exchange

I logged into my facebook the other day and saw that one of my friends had posted the following on her page: Prop 8: An attack on religious freedom in the name of 'equality' which is nothing more than a formality.

Here's what followed...

Me: An attack on religious freedom? How are they attacking anyone? You are still free to believe and practice your religion as you please, whether or not it passes, so your argument doesn't make any sense.

Her: If my religion tells me homosexuality is morally wrong then isn't it discrimintation to force the church I believe in to allow homosexual marriages in the temple or else risk the legal raminfications and lawsuits that will follow if they do not comply? How is that constitutional? I think everyone should have equal rights, absolutely, but as soon as the rights given to one marginalizes the rights of the rest then equality no longer exists.

Me: No one can force the church to have gay marriages in the temple, just as no one can force the church to allow non-members or unworthy members inside the temple. Prop 8 is an issue of the STATE of California, not the church. We passed laws in 1964 to prohibit discrimination against African Americans, and that did not stop the church from withholding the Priesthood from them for another 14 years (they were given it in 1978). Prohibiting discrimination against homosexuals will not stop the church from withholding marriage from them in temples. Again, Prop 8 has nothing do with religion; my opposition to it has everything to do with stopping hate.

Her: Technically, the law CAN force them or else they have the right to take away their status as a tax-exempt institution in that state. This law is setting a precedent. How do I know? Years spent in the political world and mindless hours spent in committee meetings, the senate, and the house. I've argued both sides of this issue so many times. The problem is Prop 8 is not a stand alone policy and I can tell you that regardless of anyone saying it is a simple law it requires state regulation which trumps private property rights. (this includes the temple, churches, the dr. office, private schools, etc.) Yes, the law CAN mandate on this issue and the outcome will create problems. This is NOT human rights. This is state mandated say-so. My issue on this has nothing to do with "stopping hate" or altering our social institutions- my issue is with state-mandated policy. Have you read the language of Prop 8? All it does it simply amend the constitution but saying "Only marriage between a man and a woman is valid or recognized in California" That's it. And by this it is not retroactive and it does not limit any future law(s) or rights that the homosexual community may wish to have as a civil union. Please do not compare this to a racial issue. This is absolutely not racial- it's about sexuality orientation and the current social norm on it's morality in society. Gay and lesbian is not a race.

Me: I compared this to race because I feel it comes down to the issue of whether or not you believe homosexuals "choose" to be that way--I believe they do NOT, just as no one chooses their own race. Therefore, I feel the association is a valid one...and I strongly feel that homosexuals should not be discriminated against for being who they were born as (I'm assuming because you are LDS, you believe it's a choice as that's what you have been taught). Ultimately, I feel your argument is invalid because it has NOT happened in any of the countries that have already passed laws to allow for gay marriage, such as Denmark. Watch out for those slippery slopes of logic, which unfortunately breed paranoia that leads to discrimination against people based on their beliefs and is the same argument that was used to discriminate against people of color in the past.
I can see that we've reached an impasse--so I will close with this: the homosexuals I know, many of whom are former LDS church members, have no desire whatsoever to be married in the temple, or even by an LDS bishop...so even if the "technicality" of the law could pose a threat, which it does not, then it still wouldn't be an issue. Thanks for at least being willing to discuss this issue with me, which is more than most people have done. I appreciate your good sportsmanship. :-)

Due to the multiple negative responses I've received because I do not support Prop 8, I wanted to address it. And that's all I'm going to say about it here.

My Sexy Sister

Kaj, forgive me for doing this, but I am so impressed that I had to--anyhoo, my little sister is getting married, and my sweet friend Raquel took their engagement photos about a week ago. So you should all click on the "Best Photographer in the World" link on my page and scroll down till you find "K and M Engagements" to see some HOT pics of my sis and her fiance. Ow OW!

Good News...Finally!

Well friends, we here at the Hodgen house are VERY excited, not just because we've managed to survive 5 whole years of marriage (haha see the previous post), but because today we heard from none other than our elusive friend the Federal Aviation Administration. The amazing part is that this time, we only had to wait 2 weeks instead of the usual 4 (or, in one instance, 7). And as you can guess by the happy tone of my writing, Jacob's medical certificate has been cleared. So, once we actually receive the darn thing in the mail (today we received a letter of notification--the actual certificate is still coming), he can fly solo, complete the training for his private pilot's license, and then we can get him off to commercial flight school. HOORAY for there finally being a light at the end of this awful tunnel!! It is SO nice to have some good news for a change!! :-)
Anyway, just wanted to share. Hope all you peeps are happy and well!

5 Years...

5 Years ago today I married my awesome hubby. Our marriage has had its share of ups and downs but when I look back at our journey, I can honestly say I am so happy I married him. In honor of our 5 year mark, I'll take a cue from my sweet friend Jen and share how we met.

So, in January 2003 I had finally moved out of my parents' house and into an apartment with my friend Tiffany. I had absolutely no intention of finding a spouse--in fact, I had complained to my mom on several occasions that I didn't want to move out because I'd just meet someone and get married and I wasn't ready for that. I had decided to go back to school at UVSC after taking a year hiatus, and I really didn't want any distractions (especially since I had enrolled in my first math class in 6 years...BLAH!).

One cold morning I was walking to school (my apartment was really close) and noticed a boy walking not too far from me. I couldn't really tell if he was cute or not since he was bundled up in a coat and hat, but I was drawn to him anyway. He slowly got closer and politely asked, "Do you know where the science building is?" I directed him and we made some small talk about how it was really cold and what not, and then we went our separate ways to class. A few days later I was walking home from class, and passed him on the way--I said a friendly "Hello" and he opened his mouth as if to say something, but I guess he changed his mind cuz he just kept going (he swears this never happened, but I have it documented in my journal...haha).

I began to see him a lot more--I realized he was in my ward and lived in my same complex. However, I didn't have the courage to talk to him since he hadn't answered me that one day (I know, stupid huh?) so I thought there was no way he'd be interested. Then one day in church Tiffany turned to me and whispered, "I found your next boyfriend." I asked who, and she pointed at Jacob. I asked how she knew and she replied, "I just have a vibe about him." Since we didn't know his name, from then on we called him Vibe Boy.

At this point the whole Vibe Boy thing was just a joke between myself and my roommates; I continued to see him around but never felt like there was a good opportunity to talk to him. One night after my evening PE class, I arrived at the complex at the same time he did and I thought, "Yes, this is it!" Unfortunately, I couldn't get the girl who gave me a ride home to shut up, so by the time I started walking into the building, he was well ahead of me and reached his apartment by the time I could catch up. However, he did turn around and look at me just before he walked in the door, so that gave me some hope.

My co-worker and good friend Cami had heard every detail of my Vibe Boy saga, and after hearing about my close encounter with making verbal contact, she made a bet with me...it was a Friday, and I had until Monday morning to find out Vibe Boy's name or I owed her a bag of Snickers bars. I left work that day determined and feeling confident. However, I didn't see him on Saturday and by Sunday I was really nervous--I knew it would have to be in Sunday school or not at all. I sat there, not paying any attention while I tried to hash out a game plan. At one point I decided to go get a drink. After I sat back down in my chair, Tiffany whispered to me to turn around--I did, and Vibe Boy was staring at me. Once he noticed I saw him looking, he dropped his head and stared at the floor.

Believe it or not, this gave me the confidence I needed to talk to him. I walked right up to him after the lesson was over, asked his name and we made plans to hang out that same day. He came over to my apartment that night, and we've been completely inseparable ever since. We got married 7 months later, and 5 years later I'm thrilled to report that we are happy as ever. So here's to you Jacob, I love you!!!!

Things You Probably Don't Really Care That Much About

So this morning I was hike, hike hiking along when I stumbled across yet another tarantula. This one was not as big as the first one, but every bit as creepy. The way they move totally wigs me out...they're like, "I'm cooooommmmming for youuuuuuu!" GROSS. But anyway, it got me thinking--I really need to update my blog, since the last post was about that tarantula we saw forever ago. I don't have anything super exciting to talk about, but what the hell, let's have a brain dump, shall we? Here goes. :-)

Hiking: For everyone's information, today I set a new personal record for how fast I am able to drag my sorry butt up to the top of the "Y" and back down again--now I can do it in 49 minutes flat. Before you know it I'll be running up as well as down (there are actually people who do that, it's true...I've seen them with my very own eyes...and I'm very jealous of their abilities). Go me.

Federal Aviation Administration: STUPID. Due to their inability to complete even the most simple of tasks, Jacob now has to wait another month (at least) to get his medical certificate cleared. Yeah, they lost the updated application that we both faxed and overnighted to them... Fedex and everything, yup. Morons. Someday I want to go work for a government organization where I will be motivated to do absolutely nothing with any sense of accuracy and within no time frame whatsoever, so I can leave people hanging on the fate of their career choice for months at a time. Should be very fulfilling.

Jobs: Still got mine, thank goodness. I laid off Jacob yesterday though (no, they did not ask me to deliver the news myself--I offered after my supervisor pulled me aside and told me she was gonna do it--I figured it would be better if it came from me, since Jacob kinda hates her...), so hooray for our income being cut in half. Haha no really, we knew it was coming since Jacob was hired for the summer only. He disliked the job anyway, so he was actually relieved...it was harder on me than it was on him. Why? Well, I really liked having him around, it was fun. But mainly it was because it was a reminder that no one at work has any loyalty to me--ah, the lies. I won't go into details. I will just say that I find it interesting to watch people lie to my face without even realizing they've just revealed their untruths.


Friends: On a bright and happy note, I have been fortunate enough to spend some time with good friends lately and yes Cajsa, I snagged this picture off your facebook hehe. My head looks really big, doesn't it? Well, in my defense, I was closer to the camera than they were, since I was holding it. Anyway, thanks to my dear friends Peter and Cajsa for being amazing people--I love that time can never touch our friendship. I am always so happy to find that it doesn't matter how long it's been since we've seen each other (either we need to move to Sweden or Cajsa needs to move here), we can still laugh and talk as though no time has passed. That's when you know you have good friends, I think. So I love you guys. And Raquel, I love you too--I will always be your wingman (or wingwoman...?), thanks again for lunch, I will get it next time!!

Politics: To my conservative friends, feel free to skip this part. I don't apologize for my views, or for anything said here...but I don't want to offend, that is not my purpose. Anyway...please, oh please let it be over. November cannot come fast enough. Although my vote is essentially null and void because I live in Utah and Obama doesn't stand a chance of winning here, I will still go and do my duty as a citizen. But it's gotten to the point where I can't even watch the news any more, because they frequently put her on there, and wow, the thought of Sarah Palin anywhere near the white house terrifies me. I'm not saying she's unintelligent (although I do frequently refer to her as "Sooooooooooooo stupid!!!"), and I will readily admit that she has potential to be a very strong player for the Republican party--I'm saying she makes Obama look like the most experienced politician in the world. Seriously. She needs to take a few more years to wisen up to the ways of Washington. The Katie Couric interview kills me, it's so painful to see her repeatedly stumble over her own words and further prove that she is in way over her head. Her foreign policy stems from the fact that Alaska is neighbor to Russia and Canada and sometimes those damn Putin airplanes come into our airspace??? ARE YOU KIDDING ME??? And I know she's only the VP candidate, but here's the thing--McCain has had not one, not two, but FOUR bouts of cancer. While he has been pronounced healthy at the present, cancer is an ugly, ugly disease that can strike at any time, and his track record is extremely poor. If he croaks in office, the thought of Sarah Palin stepping up as our commander and chief terrifies me to no end. When Iran proceeds with its nuclear weapons program, what's she gonna do?? "Well, dagnabbit Mr. Ahmadinejad, don't you bring your planes into our airspace!!!" No, no...this cannot happen. Obama may not be the man to fix what Bush has done, but I have hopes that he can at least keep it from getting much worse--whereas I truly fear that if McCain and Palin get elected, this country will see more disaster than it's seen in decades.

Ok, that's enough for one day. I have to get ready for work now, so you are all spared from any more dumpage of my brain. Until next time...I bid you good day.

I've never seen one before...

...in the wild...

Because I live so conveniently close to the "Y" trail and the rim trail, I have been doing a LOT of hiking--I hike one of them every day. While doing so, I usually see a lot of squirrels, even more grasshoppers, the occasional deer and if I'm really lucky, a fox.

But the other day while hiking the rim trail with Jacob, his sister and her husband, we stumbled across THIS:

DISGUSTING (I'm sure most of you are aware of my HUGE aversion to arachnids, especially those of the very large and hairy variety). It was friggin' right in the middle of the trail! I know it's hard to tell how big it is from the picture, and for the life of me I wish the video we took of it (we only had our cell phones w/us--of all days to not bring the camera, geeez!) had survived so you could see Jacob putting his hand in close proximity to it to illustrate how huge it was because seriously, it was gigantic. But alas, I thought I saved it but I must have failed to do so as it is nowhere to be found. Anyway...

I didn't even know we had tarantulas in Utah. Ew ew ew ew ew ew--I still go hiking every day (I even hiked the rim trail just yesterday) but I can tell you that my eyes are a LOT more alert now, and I really hope I never run into one of these guys again. Well, at least not by myself...

Jacob is my favorite

I knew Jacob would see through my lies. Here's what was waiting for me when I got home yesterday...
Thank you again, Jacob. I love you!

Fooled Again

Today's entry on this blog o' mine is going to consist pretty much of a lot of whining and venting. And--heads up--there will probably be a lot of feminine details. Feel free to skip it, and don't say I didn't warn you.

So--I am having a really, really hard day today. Despite my determination to lie to Jacob and insist I'm fine (which he can see right through), I am not. I really want to be fine, I hate feeling weak and vulnerable and I loathe the lump that has formed at the back of my throat which will not go away despite repeated attempts to distract myself with other things.

Today I just don't know if I can handle this infertility thing. I mean...I can, I have no choice. I just really don't want to at the moment.

Recap--I went off the clomid a few months ago when my doc referred me to an infertility specialist. I haven't taken anything since. To my pleasant surprise, I had a period the month after I went off the infertility drugs...I was thrilled, and figured maybe the clomid had "reset" me so to speak. I hoped that perhaps we could get pregnant without medical intervention. The next month I had a period again. Go me, my body was doing what it's supposed to! I really believed that maybe, just MAYBE I was "cured" so to speak of this...after all, I used to ovulate regularly, I never in my life had a problem (other than the occasional skipped month) until I went off the damn birth control pills. But anyway...

...this month I was late. I did NOT get my hopes up...even when I ovulated every month, my cycle has never been what you'd call regular and I've never known exactly when my period will come (not even when I was taking clomid). I remained unconvinced that it was anything other than me being late--I learned very early on in this process that even entertaining the possiblity of being pregnant only results in devastating heartbreak (when I actually was pregnant last year, it took 2 tests for me to believe it). So I waited.

At the beginning of the 2nd week, I got an overwhelming feeling that I was pregnant. I immediately tried to discard it, thinking there was no way--but the feeling lingered. No matter how many times I screamed at my brain that I was NOT pregnant, I couldn't shake the feeling that this time, I was.

Then I was two weeks late. I resolved to wait at least another week before even considering taking a test...then I started feeling overly emotional. After that it was, "Am I peeing more?" Ever the skeptic, I did my best to NOT read into anything. I guess I did a pretty poor job.

Finally, I picked the date I'd take the test, and that day was today.

After I got home from work last night I put the test on the bathroom counter and went to bed. I tossed and turned and couldn't stop thinking about it. "What if I am??? No--I'm not, I don't really have many of the symptoms. But they say every pregnancy is different, so maybe this one feels different from the other one. Some women don't feel any symptoms at all..." And on and on and on until I was ready to go insane. Then that stupid, awful feeling came back, stronger than it was before--"YOU'RE PREGO, DUMMY." Exhausted and at my wit's end, I said what the hell, I'll trust it. That did the trick and I drifted off to sleep...

...only to wake up at 5:45 when my stupid cat decided she wanted to eat (normally she waits until at least 7:00 to start her incessant meowing). I stumbled into the bathroom, saw the test sitting there and immediately went into what I like to call heartbreak prevention mode--which consists of repeatedly telling myself, "It's negative, it's negative, it's gonna be negative." It helps ease the sting of when I'm right. So I took the test, went and paced in the living room for 3 minutes, and came back...the whole time saying to myself that it was negative, the damn feeling still telling me it'd be positive.

"Not Pregnant" was clearly displayed on the digial screen. "See? Told ya so..." I thought to myself.

Stupid, stupid, stupid, utterly and completely stupid. I cannot believe I somehow deluded myself into actually trusting the feeling--believing that this was finally gonna be it. How big of a fool am I? SERIOUSLY...I know better. Where the hell did that feeling come from anyway?? And even now as I sit here, part of me is thinking..."well, maybe I ovulated really late...maybe it's still too soon to tell"...even though I KNOW that I've just gone back to not ovulating. And now I will need to take the provera to medicinally induce a friggin period so I can go back on the clomid so I can get the ultrasound my infertility specialist wants me to have to check the uterine lining or whatever (it's a long explanation, and not really relevant to this post) and basically I'm back at square one. I am almost exactly where I started, except I do know that Jacob's sperm is fine and my tubes aren't blocked. And those things are good to know--but I still have no idea why this isn't happening for us--I really hate not being able to diagnose and fix this problem. And after what happened this morning, I feel so beyond dumb it's not even funny. I feel like total shit.

Ok well, that's not really a nice or eloquent thing to end with, but I need to leave for work soon. Sorry for being so negative. Most days I'm good. Today though, it's too much. I hope I can do this.

Boring

Hi friends. I've been thinking, "Man, I really need to post a blog" but unfortunately there just hasn't been that much going on lately. So here are my few updates...

The season ended at work so things have slowed down significantly--now I'm working 3:30-midnight and when I say working, I mean sitting around reading books, playing games, watching Arrested Development DVDs and taking the occasional phone call since we've lost most of our people.

I'm still not pregnant. No surprise there. Had a freakout about it yesterday (I tend to do that on occasion) but after 10 minutes the crying got really boring so Jacob and I went hiking instead.

Jacob and I are STILL waiting to hear from the FAA about his medical certificate. Should be any day now, honestly. Although I know how holidays have a tendency to mess up the inner workings of all federal agencies, so I wouldn't be surprised if it takes an extra week because of Labor Day. Anyway, as soon as he has that cleared, Jacob can start flying solo and that will allow him to be a lot more aggressive on his lessons and earning his flight hours. Right now he's kind of stuck...so we will be really happy once they give him the green light. Yes.

Other than that, there's really not much to say. We work a lot and watch a ton of movies, that's pretty much our life. So yeah...will write more when I actually have something to write about. :-)

As Promised...

...lots of things going on in my brain today, but I wanted to write about the aforementioned weddings and vampire books I mentioned in a previous post.

So I had the opportunity to attend a friend's wedding a week ago. It was being held in a back yard, and I had imagined a really big house, nice yard, etc...simply because that's the typical setting I've seen for outdoor weddings. This wedding was nothing of the sort. Not that the place was a dump...it was a nice, modest-sized house in a quiet neighborhood. Nothing wrong with that, it just wasn't what I was expecting. The yard was decorated with a few tables with homemade centerpieces, and there was a simple archway with some flowers at the far end of the yard, with a simple piece of fabric laid out on the grass, making up the "aisle." The ceremony started off as any other...groomsmen walked bridesmaids down the aisle and to their designated spots, the parents followed...and then my friend, in her beautiful dress. She was absolutely gorgeous. The ceremony lasted no longer than 5 minutes...the bishop gave a few words of advice, the couple said their "I do's" and that was it. Afterwards, we ate food, listened to music and chatted. The thing that really touched me, though, was my inability to stop looking at my friend and her new husband. I wish I could describe the incredible joy and perfectly pure love the two of them radiated as they enjoyed their reception...I was so drawn to that. I have never seen anything like it except at perhaps my own wedding, and I spent the rest of the night kicking myself for failing to bring my camera so that I might have captured it. And I know this is extremely cliche, but it was a wonderful reminder to me that you don't need a big house, nice yard, fancy decorations and catered food to have a magical wedding. I don't think there was anything that could have been done to make their wedding more beautiful, I really don't.

Moving right along...sticking to my theme of sappy sentiment, I'm sure many of you have seen this picture and thought, "Nooooooo, not those stupid vampire books!" I used to be one of you...but now...hahaha ok, that's just cheesy, even for me...


...seriously though, I resisted and resisted reading these books, until one day I was eating lunch with some girlfriends when one of them said to another regarding some guy who'd come up in the conversation, "Oh, that sounds like Edward." I made the mistake of asking, "Who's Edward?" They all looked at me like I was insane. My friend ran from the room and came back with 3 very thick books, insisting I read them. I protested repeatedly until my friends finally broke me down, me threatening them with the wrath of Jacob if I got hooked and suddenly became a negligent wife (yes, it's happened before with books I've enjoyed, I'll sit and read for hours and totally ignore him). They all laughed at me and told me I'd love the books. I left quite skeptical.


I began reading Twilight that night at work...finding nothing particularly special about it, but appreciating the fact that it was an easy read. The next day I picked it up again at home, and the next thing I knew, 3 hours had passed and it was time for me to go to work. By the end of my shift that night, I'd finished that one and had started on New Moon, which I finished the following day...and so it continued with Eclipse. Fortunately for me, I finished that one two days after Breaking Dawn had been released, so off to Barnes & Noble I went, and read that one in yes, a single day. Poor Jacob had to spend the weekend playing games on the computer.


I'm still kind of humiliated that I got THAT hooked on them. I mean, I finished the whole series in 5 days. Good grief. But that got me thinking...what in the WORLD is it about these books that makes them so addictive to girls (I don't think most guys really care that much)?? I have decided that Stephanie Meyer is a genius. Not because she's an amazing writer...because in all reality I don't think she's nearly as talented as people give her credit for (and what is her strange obsession with the word "chagrin?" She uses it more than anyone I've seen). However, she has successfully tapped into the hopeless romantic portion of the female brain. She made Edward the perfect man, and on top of being perfect made him dark, mysterious and basically unavailable. And we all know that every girl wants what she can't have. Then we have her protagonist, Bella...who is the literary embodiment of almost every insecurity we females have. She's not the prettiest girl in school, she's socially awkward, she doesn't say the right things, she's a total klutz, and depending on who you ask, she's incredibly stupid (sorry ladies, after reading books 2 & 3 that was my assessment...she only somewhat redeemed herself in book 4)...need I say more? It's the whole Jane Eyre complex--the mediocre, average girl (some may even say ugly, although I don't think that description quite fits Bella) gets the hot guy. And for successfully pulling that off, I applaud Stephanie Meyer. Seriously. Wish I could tap into that and make hundreds of thousands as well.

And then we have the movie coming out in December. A lot of people have complained about the actor playing Edward not being hot enough...my compalint lies with Bella. No offense to Kristen Stewart, she just wouldn't have been my choice. No matter though, I'm sure the hopeless romantic in me will be secretly excited (and I say secretly, because I'm still halfway in the closet about how much I liked the books...) to see the story I enjoyed so much translated into film, despite my disapproval of the casting director's choices. Having said that, I do think it's a good thing that the director is a woman...not that a man couldn't do a nice job with it...I just don't know if a guy could do it the same justice that (hopefully) a woman will. It will be interesting to see if the reception of the movie is as good as it's been with the books.

One thing I will say though, is that my dislike for extremely large crowds of hormonal adolescent girls does outweigh my desire to see the movie...hopeless romantic be damned, I will

wait a good few weeks after it opens to see it.

Ugh, ok...enough of that. Next time I'll talk about something less cheesy...

Camping

So we randomly decided to go camping last Saturday night...we packed up the car, hit the road and ended up at Wasatch Mountain State Park in Midway. I love this campground, first of all because it has actual bathrooms with sinks and flushing toilets (the whole squatting thing doesn't really make me happy), and also because each campsite has a fire pit, BBQ grill, picnic table, and the tent pad has sand instead of dirt, so you can enjoy a nice meal (we had tinfoil dinners) and then you don't have to worry about your back getting poked by rocks when you sleep. It's really good times.

Once we got there, Jacob started a fire (notice the rather large container of lighter fluid on the table haha) as I prepared to set up the tent.

However, after I'd laid out the tarps and grabbed the tent, I realized that we had failed to bring the tent poles with us (in fact, since the move I have no idea where they even are, because they weren't by the tent...). Yeah, we had the tent, but no poles. BRILLIANT. We had managed to remember to bring our air mattress (YES, we sleep on a full-on queen-sized air mattress when we camp...that was my idea), so we decided we'd go ahead and sleep under the stars...here's where we were going to sleep...

But then we looked at the sky...

...and since I'm really not too keen on getting wet when I sleep, here's where we actually ended up sleeping...

It was a good thing too, because it rained. And you know, surprisingly enough, sleeping in the back of our car wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it would be. I could actually fully extend my legs (Jacob had to sleep diagonally), and even though it was a little bit hard on my back, thanks to my pillow (Jacob didn't bring one and apparently I don't like to share mine once I'm asleep, so he was a bit grumpy about that) I was pretty comfortable. In fact, the morning clean up was so easy (our least favorite part of camping is taking down the tent in the morning...) and fast, that I think we'll probably do the whole car camping thing again. NICE.

For the evening's festivities, we didn't do much other than sit by the fire, munch on snacks and talk. It was really relaxing.

Haha we also tried to make some Jiffy Pop...but we were highly unsuccessful (as have been previous attempts at making the stuff while camping). This is what happened when we tried to cook it over the fire...

And here's what we ended up with. Not a salvageable piece in there. We were pretty entertained by it though, being the pyros that we are. :-)

So all in all it was a good trip, burned popcorn and all. Although I won't lie, I was really happy to get back to sleeping in my own soft, extremely comfortable bed last night...

I'm Baaaaaack...

Hi people. I have so much I could potentially write about...here we go.

First, it's movie review time:
The Dark Knight-AMAZING. Enough said. Although for a more in-depth analysis, feel free to check out my friend Peter's blog (the link is to your right). He is, after all, a Batman expert. :-)

Mamma Mia!-Surprisingly enjoyable. For me, at least...after all, I was QUITE skeptical. I think to really like it, you'd have to be a dyed in the wool ABBA fan (which I am, thanks to my parents...who made sure my siblings and I were very well versed in their songs starting basically when we were born), and I also think people would enjoy the movie more if they've already seen the actual show (although they might be slightly irked at the things that didn't make the final cut of the movie). I am not a Meryl Streep fan, but she surprised me with how well she did. And kudos to Colin Firth for being one of the most entertaining gay characters I've ever had the pleasure of watching. One complaint though...WHO in the WORLD cast Pierce Brosnan as an American??? And a NEW YORKER no less!! Sheesh, not only was he the worst singer in the entire cast, but he couldn't hide his British accent to save his LIFE. Awful. No offense to him, he's a pretty good actor...but this was NOT the role for him, by any stretch of the imagination.

The Midnight Meat Train-Worse than horrible. Not that most of you would ever consider seeing it...after all, it's an R-rated slasher flick. But it was BAD, even for Clive Barker (who directed films like Hellraiser, if that helps any of you...). Seriously, I was pissed that we actually spent money on our tickets, even though we only spent about $3 (it was released directly to the dollar theater, which I tried to tell Jacob was a very bad sign...). Yeah. I'd reccomend staying at home to stare at the wall, it would be a better use of your time.


Moving right along...here's what's been going on at our house as of late:

I bet you have no idea what that is. My camera is not cool enough to effectively capture fire, and I know this because I tried it on every setting it had. Anyway, this is the view from just outside my front door at 2:00am on July 25th after some brainiacs hiked the Y and lit off a bunch of fireworks for the 24th...and managed to catch the mountain on fire. Jacob had gone to sleep way before this happened and had left the window open...so our house smelled like a campfire that night. Good times, eh? I was never worried about having to be evactuated or anything, but I will admit it was slightly unsettling to arrive home from work and see the fire so close to our house. So kids, don't hike a mountain covered in dry gass and light off fireworks. You'll probably get arrested if you do.

Here's what my cats have been doing lately:

I know, that's not super exciting...but I think they're so dang cute. Not every afternoon, but quite frequently they'll come sunbathe once it gets to be about 4:00pm...that's the optimal sun time (and our apartment usually gets quite hot...). I'm usually insistant on closing the blinds so it doesn't start cooking in here, but when my cats do that I just leave them open...yes, I'm a weird cat lady.

Ok, gotta go pick up Jacob from the airport (yes, he's flying planes 4 times a week now...with his instructor in the cockpit with him, of course...but still, he does most of it by himself), but those of you who know me will not be surprised to hear that I am far from finished. Until next time...when I will talk about weddings, Twilight (yes, you heard me...I got hooked on those damned vampire books), and whatever else I have in my head at the time...

It's been far too long...

Hi devoted blog readers...all 3 of you... ;-)

I am very excited, because we've been living in this apartment for a month now and today we finally, FINALLY have internet. HOORAY! I was just blogging at work (it's a great thing to do at 1:30am), but then the stupid IT guys blocked blogspot (because they both have little man syndrome and like to block everything that anybody likes...seriously), so that put an abrupt end to that. Anyhoo, just wanted to say that now I can blog again...so stay posted, there's more blogging to come!

I don't even know...

Today has been kind of a hard day. I had a long talk with my mom about my struggles with the church and I made her really upset. That was not my intention, and I HATED it. I hate making anyone cry, but making my mom cry is just about the worst feeling in the world. She kept saying, "It's not you, I'm just thinking about Karin and Brian (my siblings, neither of whom have anything to do w/the rest of our fam and who have both had their names removed from the records of the church)." But I know that wasn't the truth, it was me. I wasn't trying to hurt her, I just want to be honest.

Then I came to work and I had to fire another employee. This time I did it myself, and it wasn't scary--but I don't really enjoy firing people, it's never very pleasant.

But the kicker came about halfway through my shift as I was sitting and talking with a couple of co-workers about this and that. We were laughing and joking and then Kristy (remember her? The 17-yr old w/a baby at home and another on the way) came running over--literally--because she wanted to show us some pictures of her baby on her cell phone. So we were politely looking and there was one of her baby in a kiddie pool and we commented that she was teaching her how to swim early. She said, "Yeah, she's a really good swimmer and she's only 7 months old!" Then my co-worker said, "Babies can swim before they're born, that's all your baby is doing in there." Kristy said, "Yeah, she did a good job swimming in the pool." She was obviously confused, so I said, "No, he meant the baby inside you."
And then...
Kristy said, "Oh I lost that baby. I went to the doctor and they said I had lost it because I was throwing up all the time so yesterday they cleaned me out."
--PAUSE--
I said, "You had the D&C yesterday? Because I know that takes a few days to recover from." She said yes, but that she hates lying down and she loves work so she wanted to come in even though they told her not to.
--ANOTHER PAUSE--
I made up some excuse to go back to my desk and walked away. And I was SO ANGRY.

Now, I really don't think that typically I'm a weak little girl who can't handle the fact that some people are stupid and say hurtful things...especially without realizing they're hurting someone else. It happens all the time. But I was really bugged that she lied about being pregnant and I REALLY didn't like that she was so nonchalant about losing a baby she never even had.

Ok, I don't have proof she wasn't pregnant...but I have been suspecting it for a while, because every time I'd ask her how far along she was she'd say, "3 months." For one thing, pregnant women rarely measure in months, they measure in weeks. Not to mention she could never tell me her due date. And then there's the fact that there is NO WAY she'd be back at work the day after having the D&C procedure. I mean, I suppose it's possible...but she wouldn't be jumpy and hyper and running around like that. Geez, it took me 2 days just to get the anesthesia out of my freaking system, and another day or two to feel physically normal again. It's just not realistic.

Basically, it stirred up everything I've been trying so very hard not to think about or be upset by. I've mostly shaken it off--I refuse to be devastated by some stupid little teenager who makes up stories to get attention (arrrrrgh I should be nicer...I know she has issues stemming from her childhood--she was a foster child, and obviously has never lived in any kind of stable and nurturing environment). But even so, it still hurts a little, and baffles me even more as to how there is any justice in the world when someone like THAT has a child and there are so many good and deserving people who are unable to (and no, I'm not just talking about Jacob and myself). Ok, that's a drama queen line if I've ever heard one. Sorry.

So I really didn't like that. Tomorrow will be a better day. And I want to end on a happier note, so I will tell you all that there's this new Indian place on University Ave called Tandoori Grill (it used to be Winger's) that has really good food. You should all go there, it will make your lives happy, if only for a moment. The end.

Animal Activists...Terrorists.

As many of you know, this is my cat Michael Jackson (he was very disgruntled after watching us moving stuff all day and then being put in a box and transported to a foreign place). I LOVE my cat, he's basically my child (I know that sounds creepy to you who don't have pets...but work with me here), and I'd be really, REALLY upset if I found out anyone was trying to harm him in any way.

However...would I put on a ski mask and do everything in my power to terrify the family and vandalize the home of someone if I knew they were in some way responsible for him being harmed? NO. Why? Because that's not the appropriate way to handle the situation.

I was reading an article on msnbc.com tonight about animal activists (http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/25574658/). This is the picture under the headline "Animal Activists Attacking Scientists' Homes: More protesters using firebombs, flooding, acid at researchers’ front doors."

I won't lie, I find this picture distrubing. Especially considering the fact that these people remind me of the terrorists we see in Iraq, Israel and other Islamic countries. These acts of terrorism are pretty much denounced by most U.S. citizens as morally wrong...and yet, we see our animal activist friends imitating them almost exactly.

I am all about the humane treatment of animals, and whether or not it's morally right or wrong to test animals is not what I'd like to discuss (although for the record, I will state that I am not entirely opposed to the medical testing of animals...if we need to test some mice and monkeys to find a cure for cancer or AIDS, then I say by all means do it). What I'd like to discuss is the methodolgy behind it.

I stated to my husband that I don't think these tactics are effective. He reminded me that without said tactics, the U.S. would stil be a British Colony. And it's true...without acts such as the Boston Tea Party (where men disguised themselves...and then vandalized and destroyed property that was not theirs), our country would not be the nation it is today.

My question is, are these tactics still effective presently?

I don't think they are. If you go to YouTube and watch some of the videos of these wackos (ok sorry, it's hard to not be biased...) raiding research facilities and "freeing" the animals, it's pretty scary. I won't reference any videos here...you can look them up for yourself, they're not hard to find. I will admit that it does appear that some of the animals these people retrieve look mistreated...however, I don't feel these individuals are justified in their actions...2 wrongs do not make a right in my opinion, and certainly not in this case.

And what about the families of these people...are they to be subject to the terrorist tactics just because their father/husband participates in the testing of animals?

"...Kordower has not faced attacks or protests. University of Utah neuroscientist Audie Leventhal has.
The Animal Liberation Front claimed responsibility for dousing a home owned by Leventhal with glass-eating acid and covering it with animal rights slogans. Leventhal estimated the damage at $20,000. At another home, the group claimed responsibility for putting glue in the house's locks and pouring salt to destroy the front lawn.

'Even if I retire, I'm going to tell them I didn't retire,' said the 56-year-old scientist. "There's no way they're winning."
Still, he said, he has mostly been living out of state since the protests began two years ago. He said he refuses to teach classes to avoid having a fixed time and place where activists can find him. His wife got so scared after activists scaled the gate at their home in a Salt Lake City suburb that she bought a gun, Leventhal said."

I find it completely unacceptable that these fanatics feel justified in making the lives of these people hell. It infuriates me as much as the terrorists who took down the WTC felt justified in killing thousands of people simply because they were citizens of a country whose goverment was (and still is) hated.

Bottom line is...I wish these people would take a step back and realize that not only are these tactics extremely harmful, they're not effective in the way they're meant to be. These methods don't work any more, and the only attention the activists are drawing to themselves is negative. The only thing they're doing, honestly...in my opinion of course...is making people either fear or hate them. So who will listen? Who will really hear their "message?" Ummmmm....

Ok...deep breath...stepping off the soap box...